Friends

I've just realized that I am losing my friends. It's happened gradually in the past 4 years. May, 2004, my husband and I were in a serious motorcycle accident.
Is there any other kind?

We had multiple injuries, but we can walk and talk so we are very lucky. Blessed. Still not quite right. My most serious injury was a fractured ankle. I was in a wheelchair for 3 months because I also had a broken shoulder which prevented me from using crutches. So my dear daughter, who had to postpone her wedding for 3 months, had to push and pull me everywhere all summer of 2004. She was wonderful: loving and patient with not a shred of resentment. She was so grateful to God that we were alive.

Anyway, after 2 more surgeries, countless hours of PT and a mountain of pain pills, I am still not quite right. I can walk, but not without pain. Lots of pain. I look in the mirror and I see the pain etched in my face. It does not make me feel better to know that I could be so much worse. My personal pain is eating away at my soul.

And that's why I feel so disconnected from my friends. When we came home from the hospital (I was in for 7 days, P was in for 10 days), our friends and family came in droves. We did not have to prepare a meal for 6 weeks. We were on prayer lists all over the world. And we knew we were being lifted up! But now that I have had such a rough time, I don't see my friends much. I had a business with lots of ladies that became friends, but I no longer am able to continue to work it. I just don't feel like socializing, entertaining or even chatting on the phone like I used to. I love that people are concerned, but I hate that conversations revolve around how I'm feeling and what the doctors are planning next. So I have retreated into a shell. And that's not where I want to be.


I have had my next door neighbor's son's birthday present sitting in the dining room since June, because it's too much effort to take it over.

So, I am going to intentionally make plans and reconnect with all of my dear friends. I need friends in my life and I want to be somebody that they need in their lives.

Yesterday, after my doctor visit, I had lunch with a good friend and then we went and got pedicures. I think that's a pretty good start.

Dead Wood

If I could transfer my thoughts onto this computer screen, I would have several posts by now.


But since that technology has not yet been developed, I will type and try to get my thoughts in order.


This week I have been doing lots of "yard work". For some it's work, for me it's therapy. And believe me, I have lots of reasons to need therapy, but that's another story. In one of my "sessions", I clipped and pruned dead branches from my azaleas. Looking at the bushes I could not easily see the dead branches, but when I crouched down, pulled the branches aside and got to the heart of the bush, there is was! Deadwood. Oh, I love to prune! I know you don't prune azaleas at this time of year, but I'm pretty sure there will be no spring blossoms on the dead branches. When outside, I usually spend time with God. I leave my ipod off so I won't be distracted by Brad Paisley. As I was cutting and talking to God, I thought about all the deadwood we all have hidden under our pretty branches. All the sins. All the bad thoughts. All the bad deeds. All the good deeds gone undone. We're just like the azalea bushes. The deadwood needs to come out in order for the light to reach our hearts. The pruning took place over a couple of days and each time I went back to a bush, I noticed more and more tender, new leaves that were hidden deep within the dead branches were now flourishing. In my pruning, I let more sunshine in so those little guys could grow and not be crowded out by the all deadwood. I kept thinking about us, God's people, and how we all need more light to shine through our exterior and reach our hearts. Like the azaleas, we never stop growing. By getting rid of our deadwood, we will be happier, healthier Christians.